Today I turn 32. Thirty-two does not seem like a milestone. Typically I would just go to a sports game and buy an O’Neal jersey to celebrate. But if you have grade 4 brain cancer you are grateful for every birthday. Well technically I have “astrocytoma grade 4 IDH-mutant” which means statistically, I was supposed to die six months ago. (The sporty side of me loves the statistics.)
Needless to say, 31 was the most challenging year of life. I was reeling from 30 in which I had an awake craniotomy and 30 sessions of brain radiation. Then at 31, I completed 12 rounds of chemo and I was thrusted into “after” treatment with no playbook. That is no fault of my own. I am currently in the “wait and see” method as there are no approved lines of treatment available currently for me. Doctor’s tell me things like “Just focus on enjoying your family.” “Make the most of your time.” “This cancerous tumor is going to come back, so prepare.” There are few illusions of hope with this term&!#$ diagnosis.
Yet, I am manufacturing hope for some overtime. I don’t know what “Overtime” means. Am I already in the “overtime”? Is “overtime” the miraculous line of treatment? Is “overtime” an angelic cure that comes? Is “overtime” a celestial place?
In a couple weeks I will get an MRI with contrast to see if my brain cancer has returned. In the meantime I’m going to work my ass off, do dinner with my Mom, watch as much WNBA that my eyeballs can manage, have Prosecco with friends, and revive my Hinge profile. Yolo.
Is there any overtime? I have no idea, but happy 32nd birthday to me. Statistically it will take a miracle for me to see 33. I’m open to all miracles .
MJ
I feel unqualified to leave any sports references, but our equal love for Shaq!! Man, I love everything about him. I could go on for days. Was it the fact that he reminds me so much of my brother Tim? Or when he shattered the backboard or was it when he retired and wore a huge yellow chicken outfit, specially made for Shaq’s size? Or, better yet, his humility? Maybe that’s the one. Maybe that’s also what always makes MJ (also the coolest acronym) one of the coolest, most down to earth peps I’ve ever known.
I remember being so sad when everyone moved to Oklahoma. Life has always been me looking at what could have been, if I was a fellow member of the Oklahoma wolf pack. Lol! But the name of this blog is so cool and brings me back to our foundation. Whatcha gonna do with the time you got now?
Clock is ticking. Move forward. Keep pushing. Fight for every rebound, every ball, and when you see your opportunity, go for GOLD! Yep, I say let’s crush them. Let’s play this like college football, as long as you keep partnering with God, doing the damn thing, he’s obligated to do the same. You score, he scores. Damn. Keep playing the game. Maybe that’s the version we all ought to play? Good food for thought.
I imagine a sweaty face with a girlish grin, as you slip right past and make em think you were going for the shot, but whoops, no. Perfect layup.
I lie to myself. I love sports, I think it’s in our family, ha! Or WINNING!! Or face planting. Or talking a bunch of trash and then face planting? I got it, all!! Or rambling cause that’s what your cuzzo does on Friday nights for fun! Ha! I’m so cool. Love you Makayla! Get em girl.